Graduated...Now what?
I'm sooo confused. I need a shining light. A spotlight will help.
Merry Christmas everyone. I'll be in Aussie for a while so don't be a stranger if you guys plan to stop by in Melbourne. I hope you guys have a lovely Christmas :)
I didn't sleep in my bedroom last night.
I slept at 5am in the living room.
Because. I wanted to.
Nyeheh.
Alright alright...... there was a huge grasshopper in my room and I couldn't catch it so I just could not sleep. Add in the other flying thing around my room and I rest my case.
I loooooathe the bugs.
Unpredictable weather.
Fever.
Sore throat.
Flu.
But there still is a reason to smile today :) Praise the Lord!
The hills are alive
With the sound of music
With songs they have sung
For a thousand years
The hills fill my heart
With the sound of music
My heart wants to sing ev'ry song it hears
My heart wants to beat like the wings of the birds
That rise from the lake to the trees
My heart wants to sigh like a chime that flies
From a church on a breeze
To laugh like a brook when it trips and falls
Over stones on its way
To sing through the night
Like a lark who is learning to prey
I go to the hills
When my heart is lonely
I know I will hear
What I've heard before
My heart will be blessed
With the sound of music
And I'll sing once more
What's it like to live life with such passion. I marvel at you who can do that. To be so strong-willed about issues close to your heart. You, who live life knowing exactly what you want to accomplish. And at such a young age too. Hats off to you. And I always feel blessed every time these kind of people cross my path. For although I am not ready to be as passionate about social issues as you are, I thank God you have made me feel like I can be a better person. Lets start with not wasting food and water shall we?
It's a good day.
Be the change you want to see in the world - Gandhi
21 years.
It's coming to the year end again and even as I relish in the thought of growing another year older (not) and wiser (please), I get the old feelings of reminiscence again. Mistakes I've made. The things I can't change but can learn from. Mistakes others have made.
It's one of those milestone stepping stones you know? I'm all out for small stepping stones. But sometimes you come to more important crossroads. They come eventually. And like it or not, we all gotta face them. Like it or not.
And as much as I love taking one day at a time, I can't help worrying about the future. It's still hazy. Even after all this time. I love clarity. I guess it comes with the package of growing up and not wanting someone else to tell you what to do.
Am I ready? Are you? This is what slogging all those hours on studies have prepared us for. You better be. Well, I better be anyway. Hold your head high, girl. Never compromise your virtues and what you morally believe is right. One confident foot in front of the other. And, be a little thick skin. Cause the world is going to throw stones at you. People are not going to like everything about you. It's so hard to please the world. 6 billion people. Impossible in fact. Even the treasured loved ones.
"The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for."
— Bob Marley
It's hard, but it's life. Oh boy is it hard.
For the life of me I cannot remember
What made us think that we were wise and we'd never compromise
- The Freshmen by The Verve Pipe
But I am open to listen. I don't always have to agree. But I'll listen. And do my best not to be judgmental. I promise. I'm not as street smart as I wish I am to refute every view. But, I can learn. If you are willing to teach. And not judge me in the process.
For the life of me I cannot believe we'd ever die for these sins
We were merely freshmen
- The Freshmen by The Verve Pipe
I'm young. But not stupid. My gut is still in tact. A little naive. But somehow, I rather be naive than bitter.
"I don't always know the right thing to do, Lord, but I think the fact that I want to please you pleases you."
Amen to that.
Freedom never felt so good. I'll be sad to leave uni life but feeling so exhilarated right now. Watch our world.
Crossing every possible limb of my body to find a job.
And some prayers to Him :)
I've come so far and I do believe it's something to be proud of. I'll make You proud. Watch me roaaaar!
I was looking through some of my blog posts from 2006. Nostalgia on high alert. I might just cry. I might. Guess what I found?
I want no regrets,
When I look back on my life,
At all the things I've done,
I don't want to see a girl looking all forlorn saying,
" What have I become? ".
I want no regrets,
When I look at my friends of long,
At all the things they have done and seen,
And turn to myself and think,
That could have been me.
I want no regrets,
When I look back on the things of the past,
At my actions and words I never meant but said,
I wish to learn now and not repeat,
From all the immature mistakes that I've made.
I want no regrets,
Even when I don't always make,
The right choices in life,
God knows I've done my best,
So I can look back and say " It's alright".
I want no regrets,
Even when the road I take,
May make life seem unbearable at times,
I know the right choices ain't always easy,
So faith in God and stubborn pride
will carry me through such hard times.
I want no regrets,
When my decisions in life,
Cause opportunities to pass me by,
When one door closes, another opens,
So I just won't sit around and cry.
So right now as I walk thorough this life,
I'll strive to do my best,
In the years to come I'll look back and say,
" I had no regrets ".
*You know you are lazy when you start to recycle old posts. But these are classics yo.
I'm so bored.
Why people don't send stupid chain mail to me anymore? I know I said I despised them but I am bored shitless right now and I need something else to read. Right, I should pick up a book.
I have resorted to send old stupid chain mail from my hotmail account to my gmail account. I know you think I am such a sad case now. Even I pity myself. Life of a recluse student when exams draw near.
Since it is a Sunday and I'm tired of reading my journals, I'll update yet again.
The Spanish language..... is sexy. Nada Cambiara Mi Amor por Ti has been on replay since morning.
Oh, I am digging my own grave and I know it by wishing too much here. Is it too much to ask for someone who speaks Spanish to sweep me off my feet? I know French is like the love language and all but Spanish songs are just..........ear-gasmic.
Is it true? Is it?
I sometimes wonder if it is. I may deny it all I want but there is always this flicker of doubt every time I think about it.
I'm sure deep down, it's fear. Fear for the unknown. To take the first step and open up. That's why I feel that I am quite good at keeping my emotions in check. And... sometimes I believe I have trust issues. I'm too independent for my own good sometimes.
And so what if my walls are high. They are my walls and I'll build them as high as I want to.
I ran out of fruits. Not happy. Market only opens on Tuesday. Bother.
Time for church.
I love strawberries. Buy me a box and make me happy.
So I did not forget this random facts stuff. Just been a little busy. I'm going to be a graduate soooooooon. It's all so final now. More on that later.
The weird people/spammers who keep commenting on my chatbox is getting pretty annoying. Not apologising if you are one of them. I stand my ground.
My childhood was filled with Calvin and Hobbes, Archie and Garfield comics. I miss them.
Heheh. I love Hobbes.
I'm contemplating this when I have kids :D
Amidst the laughter and mischief, there comes a time when you never expect a comic to pull at your heartstrings. That's why Calvin and Hobbes is one of the best to me. 
I've had an awesome 2 week break. Truly and so deeply blessed. Of course, the pockets have been singed just a little bit. Alright, I lie. A lot. But I'll be more thrifty from now on yes? But so many birthdays coming up! Macam mana? I'll survive on oats for a while. I shaaaaalllll. Not that I don't need to loose that extra weight anyway. Bother.
Don't tell me I am bias towards country music. I know it.
Maybe it's punishment for being careless.
Before the world began
You were on His mind
And every tear you cry
Is precious in His eyes
Because of His great love
He gave His only Son
Everything was done
So you would come
Nothing you can do
Could make Him love you more
And nothing that you've done
Could make Him close the door
Because of His great love
He gave His only Son
Everything was done
So you would come
Come to the Father
Though your gift is small
Broken hearts, broken lives
He will take them all
The power of the Word
The power of His blood
Everything was done
So you would come
-Hillsong United
Yes, I'm alive.
No, I am not seeing anyone.
I was just busy. Sorry.
Thanks for asking. I hope I didn't disappoint.
Heh. Love.
Bless The Broken Road by Rascal Flatts will never get old. Sing it for me and win my heart. I'll be putty in your hands :)
My latest of a long list of loves. I need to stop falling for guys with guitars. It's not good for me.
Since I am constantly racking my brain for things to blog about other than rants when the exam and assignment season comes, I'm going to start this new Random Facts About Me series or whatchamacallit. Stay tuned.
Boy: I like ice cream.
Can you guess?
I said I needed inspiration. Last night I spilled water on my laptop. It died on me. And it was still dead this morning when I took it to the shop. Not saying my lappy doesn't need to be changed already but I really do not need the hassle of getting used to a new one in my final semester. Mainly cause I was also looking at the Macbook. White is pretty.
Uni starts tomorrow. Happy happy joy joy. And I mean it.It's getting too boring at home. And I need to stop eating. Stupid sales on chocs.
Oh boooooooooy.
Why can't I have pinchable cheeks like her and still look so adorable and cute????!!! The world is unfair.
I dreamed I had an INTERVIEW WITH GOD.
“So, you would like to interview me?” GOD asked.
“If you have time,” I said.
GOD smile. “My time is eternity… what questions do you have in mind for me?”
“What surprises you the most about humankind?”
GOD answered…
“That they get bored with childhood, that they rush to grow up, and then long to be children again.”
“That they lose their health to make money… and then lose their money to restore their health.”
“That by thinking anxiously about the future, they forget the present, such that they live in neither the present nor the future.”
“That they live as if they would never die, and die as though they had never lived.”
GOD’s hand took mine… and we were silent for a while.
And then I asked, “As a parent, what are some of life’s lessons you want your children to learn?”
GOD replied, “To learn they cannot make anyone love them. All they can do is let themselves be loved.”
“To learn that it is not good to compare themselves to others.”
“To learn to forgive by practicing forgiveness.”
“To learn that it only takes a few seconds to open profound wounds in those they love, and it can take many years to heal them.”
“To learn that a rich person is not one who has the most, but is one who needs the least.”
“To learn that there are people who love them dearly, but simply do not yet know how to express or show their feelings.”
“To learn that two people can look at the same thing, and see it differently.”
“To learn that it is not enough that they forgive one another, but they must also forgive themselves.”
“Thank you for your time,” I said humbly.
“Is there anything else you would like your children to know?”
GOD smiled, and said… “Just know that I am here.” “Always.”
-Author Unknown
And here we go again.
Those 21 years seem short now. Come to think of it. I need a time machine. So I can go back to a few years and not wish I would be graduating soon.
To think I'll be graduating soon. I'm having a love hate relationship with it right now. If only applying for PR wasn't so insanely hard now, I'll gladly graduate and slog off at work.
I despise the indecisive nature of mine. To the bone. Study? Work?
The long journey ahead with infinite paths to take. Walk with me every step of the way. Please?
I'm BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK. Missed me much? Will update soon aite? Just a little tired now. Passed the semester ;) Not with excellent grades but I DID try my best anyway.
Currently hooked on Colbie Caillat - Begin Again.
Happy holiday guys! Its the time when friends from the UK, Malaysia and Aus actually have the same holiday period, give or take a few. Skype date soooooooon?
Puzzled muzzled. Indeed.
*Blogger is being a pain because I had to retype this post 3 times.*
I hate letting this vicious cycle of exam stress get to me every time the exam season comes and I feel the need to crawl into mummy's lap.
No, I shall not turn into a coffee addict. I shall nooooooooot.
Weeeeeeeek...... SWOTVAC.
In the end, it all comes down to this. Pardon me. Exams are in 2 left corners and I have barely started to get in touch with my inner nerd self. Yes, contrary to popular belief, I do not study. I am currently rethinking my plan for the very near future and I need timeeeee. Cause I am such an indecisive brat.
If only we all could right?
Just because I feel a little narcissistic now. Here you go A, the DIY fringe.
PMS is such a b*tch. I'm gaining weight from all that extra eating.
I'm a happy sap. Because I still believe in childhood innocence. I think I should sleep more. Before I start scaring people.
Blessed Easter!
I fell down.
I can't believe it's only been a month since I got back.
I think its high time I went for that jog. It is waaaay overdue. When I can't fit into those shorts, I'll regret it so badly and I know it.
I hate it when they say that. Yet, I can't say it to your face.
DONE. Lalalaalalaalaaa~
In the process of updating the blog. I'll get there eventually. Patience is a virtue.
Stupid weighing machine. You gave me false hope. I should break you.
So everything that can go wrong, did. It would have been the crappiest weekend ever save the awesome company. But honestly, this is a test from God that I wouldn't want to go through again.
I'm so confused about what to do it scares the shit out of me. I really need that shining light right about now. If you can hear me.
I need to feel better. I really do. Melbourne, work your magic. Then again, I'm too busy to miss home now. I better get my nerd mojo back. Its only week 2 and I know nuts about what is going on.
I want to be a flower among the thorns of doubt and stress. I'll bloom one day. I will. Watch me.
Well, here I am once again ready to write about things of the top of my head because I am the type of person that really doesn't plan what to write in advance anyway. Even for academic essays, I'm always spontaneous. Thats why I still thank God and count my lucky stars I managed to score that high band for IELTS.
I'm so sorry to have abandoned you.
So, its been 3 weeks. Of interning that is. Haven't had too much hard work and no big datelines to meet or anything :) Which is good but sometimes I wish I had a more challenging job. But I understand why I can't do the more complicated stuff because I don't really have access to the systems they use. But hopefully one day I will be able to see it before I leave the place.
